Friday, April 29, 2011

…and they lived happily ever after

As the fairytale royal wedding gets underway after 30 years, millions are expected to watch Prince Williams and Kate Middleton exchange wows. And among them will be thousands of women wishing it was their turn to walk down the aisle and exchange wows with their prince charming.

Pause here and take a hard look. Prince Williams is marrying a commoner. And I’m sure – love apart – there must be other practical reasons for marrying each other too. Maybe for her security (and that too royal ;-)), and maybe for him someone who doesn’t come with all the royal trappings. It just goes to show that in life, unlike fairytales, things don’t come with neat pink bows all gift-wrapped.

People marry for all sorts of reasons, even as practical as “I think she will be great at juggling both career and home” and “I like the way he plays with children, he’ll make a caring father”.

Unfortunately, (and this trend is more in women than in men) women continue to wait for the perfect guy to come along and sweep them off their feet, only to realise that there is no prince charming -- handsome, with all the qualities, graces and sophistication of a true-blue prince, and the money to go with it. It’s a myth and just in fairytales.

If you continue to look at life with rose-tinted glasses, you’ll be in for some rude shocks. There are no true-blue princes or princesses for that matter. So maybe you should stop waiting for the ‘perfect guy’ and settle for the ‘good enough’ guy and make it work together.

Many women reject a man because he’s balding, he’s too short or he has an accent, but hey, he might be the next best thing to price charming, if you give him a chance! Many men might reject a girl because she’s too bold or too homely, but hey, if you give her a chance, you’ll see how perfectly she understands you.

In this world of instant-fundas, both genders want the perfect partner instantly. And it might work if you at least give that person a chance, even if he or she doesn’t score perfect tens in your criteria list! Also, couples are too quick to conclude that there was ‘no connection’ in their first meeting – an idea fed by mushy, romantic movies, again. But most of the times, you need to even ‘give time’ for that connection to happen. It’s not instant.

So my advice is, you can meet the person who is – not the perfect guy – but perfect for you, if you are willing to: a) give a person a decent chance, get to know him / her beyond looks or habits and b) go for a ‘good enough’ partner instead of waiting for eternity (or 100 years as in Sleeping Beauty) for prince charming to come on a white horse. You can give yourself a chance to live happily ever after, with patience, understanding and some empathy.

…And here’s hoping Prince William and Kate Middleton work towards living happily ever after!